One of My Most Favorite Advises in Life

When I was still teaching, and my students would come to me and sulk and complain about their parents' bad moods, this is the advice I always told them, something I decided to do when I was 13 years old. 

That's why I'm always amused when people here in FB rant about their reactions when other people affect their moods. Ako, I can have the worst day of my life, and you can say the nastiest things to destroy my day, but I will still choose to be in a good mood. Life is too short e......

My New Year Greeting to Everyone!

It's almost five hours into 2012 yet since the New Year still has to circle the globe, here's my greeting for everyone -

(I borrowed this from the column of Francis Kong of the Philippine Star)

May you have

        Enough success to keep you eager,
        Enough failures to keep you humble,
        Enough joy to share with others,
        Enough trials to keep you strong,
        Enough hope to keep you happy,
        Enough faith to banish depression,
        Enough friends to give you comfort,
        Enough determination to make each day better than yesterday.

(I took out the last portion since I want this message to be addressed to all my non-Catholic or non-Christian friends too!)

My Summer Memories of Oroquieta: Swimming Everyday at the Beach

When we were kids, my parents would usually bundle all five of us off to our grandparents' place in both Ozamis (maternal) and Oroquieta City (paternal) - and I always look forward to those summer vacations since it meant going to the beach everyday or playing in my lolo's big house, or eating all these fruits which were readily available since lolo had so many fruit trees in his garden.  We also got to play with our cousins who were based there and were almost about our age too. 

The picture above shows the breakwater which protected the shore of Oroquieta.  We always walked there everyday and I would always be amazed by the sheer strength of the waves that would hit it.

I love the daily swimming at the beach. I learned to float and swim because of it.  We used banana trunks to help us improve our kicks and stay afloat!  My auntie Myrna would bring along bananas as food and I remember eating it with ginamos (galunggong) and it was very tasty!  In those days, swimming in the beach was free!  No entrance fees or cottage fees.  All you needed was to bring your towel and you were set!  Those were such simple days.

On days when the tide was low, we would go out to the sea and search for marine life which was pretty interesting.  Tuyom (sea urchins) and starfishes were ordinary fare, plus all those barnacles clinging to the wooden posts of the pier.  It was really educational on one end, and pretty exciting, since we lived in the mountains and seeing all these fascinating creatures come to life and not only in books was a bonus.

I remember going there when I was Grade 3 and every year henceforth till I was in first year high school.  It stopped after that since my maternal grandparents went to the US as citizens, while both my paternal grandparents died within 6 years of each other.  However, they left me with such beautiful memories of my childhood summers, something Vic and I want Laura and Dylan to have when they are also growing up.

This Week I Will....

Well, I got into the mood of writing down what I wanted to do this week, so here it is.  I am writing in third person because it is like someone is telling me what to do.....

1.  Watch your diet.  Avoid Coke and softdrinks when you eat outside.  Just ask for water always.  I have noticed many people just drink water, even in restaurants.  Also, just bring your water jug wherever you go, like you used to, even to movies so you can cut down on buying sweetened drinks.

2.  Follow Daily Working Schedule so you can finish the book by December and have enough essays for your French blog.

3.  Pay for all tickets in cash so that you won't use your card.  You need the card for your August trip with Mabel.

4.  Vary your workout schedule. Return to Greenhills on Mondays and add Hip Hop and Attack on Tuesdays.

If I Were A Space Tourist.....

I don't think going to space as a tourist is going to be a reality in my lifetime but I'm pretty sure it's something mankind can achieve soon enough.  So for now, all I can do is just fantasize about it.  If I were given a chance to go to space and mankind had the technology to choose which planet to go to in the solar system, I'd book a ticket to Saturn first.  It's arguably the most beautiful of all the planets in our solar system and I'd want to find out what those rings really look like when we're near it.  Most likely I'll be taking lots of pictures of it from different angles since I just learned too that as Saturn tilts towards the sun, the rings actually disappear.  That would be cool to video!

Trying Not to Get Caught in the Christmas Gift-Giving Gauntlet

I guess my brothers and sisters and I were lucky that my parents never used things to bribe us with their love - something you always see during Christmas when parents give their children expensive gifts to show that they really love them - which in turn makes Christmas into some kind of expensive gift giving competition - like your love for me is equal to the monetary worth of your gift. Ridiculous - you say, but in my conversations with some of my friends this Christmas - that is exactly the scenario that happens in their families.  Talk about reducing the meaning of Christmas to just the number of zeros in the worth of the gift you give. 

The truth is, I've learned early on that my parents and friends just have to be there for me when I need them.  That is all the Christmas gift I need.  Any material thing, I could buy on my own.  God made sure I had enough money for it.

What I Do When Life Demands Too Much

I found this interesting article in a local magazine where it asks people what they do when life demands too much from them.  This got me thinking on how I deal with that stressor myself.  Well, usually I take a step back and look at the things should be prioritized. I then schedule them accordingly.  I also say no now so that I won't have too much on my plate.  The truth is, a life just filled with work is no life a tall.  And since I'm already getting a bit older, I am beginning to appreciate life more and the need to slow down a bit and smell the roses.

What My Friends Actually Wrote About Me in My College Yearbook!

This is me now, 16 years after college (I graduated at the age where some of my friends are already finishing their masters degrees!), and I unearthed my college yearbook and found out what my friends actually wrote about me.  It's a fun read and although what eventually happened to my life is not what's really written there, I won't trade it for anything else since I love now, the life I have created for myself!

"Faster than a speeding Ikot when late for class....
With words more powerful than a locomotive...
Able to write great essays in a single sitting....
It's a writer....it's a tutor.........
It's Antonio H. Fabe, Jr.!!
He is an industrious and witty student by day and a party-going disco-maniac by night.  A real audiophile who loves to indulge in his ever-growing collection of cassette tapes, he'll either be seen giving advice in his distinct Cebuano accent, or won't be seen at all when you need to ask him for money (just kidding).  Hopes to be a journalist and psychologist in the mold of Dr. Margie Holmes, and dreams of continued success in his tutorial business.

Indeed, a SUPER GUY!"

Days By Karle Wilson Baker

Days by Karle Wilson Baker

Some days my thoughts are just cocoons - all cold, and dull, and blind
They hang from dripping branches in the grey woods of my mind;
And other days they drift and shine - such free and flying things!
I find the gold dust in my hair, left by their brushing wings.

This is the perfect poem for me who has to write everyday.  This is quite inspiring!  Of course, not everyday is a gold dust day for me, so it's important to have the discipline to continue writing even if the inspiration is not there. 

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My Own Version of 'Eat Pray Love' Would Be 'Smile Dance Reflect'

As Vic and I left the theater after watching 'Eat Pray Love', we had a good laugh since we've actually done what Julia Roberts' character had done sans the issues that her character had to deal with - for the simple reason that we left those baggages in our lives behind a long time ago and we've decided to move forward with our lives.  We actually did what Julia's character did, just dump all those people who made us miserable and left them to wallow in their own misery - and keep them out of our lives.  So with a baggage-free life, we were able to enjoy our lives more, and our version of her 'Eat Pray Love' sojourn was 'Shop Party Have Fun' and the places would've been New York, London and Hong Kong.

Now that I've done that part of my life, if I were to create my own journey now, I'd choose Bhutan, Cuba and North Korea - and my that version would be 'Smile Dance Reflect'.  They say the Bhutanese are the happiest people on earth. Filipinos are a close second I'm sure!  I think Bhutan is one of those rare countries still untouched by the world's materialism.  I am a walking materialistic person.  My life revolves around logos in my clothes and shoes and the cars I drive.  I am like everyone else - raised to be materialistic and to be averse to a life without material things.  So Bhutan would be a mystery to me.  I would love to be on top of the world literally and experience pure happiness in a life without any hint of materialism.  That would be the Smile phase of my trip.

After that would be the Dance phase!  I've always associated Cuba with a vibrant musical scene, thanks to growing up to the music of Gloria Estefan and Celia Cruz and Harry Belafonte, who are Americans with Cuban lineage - and whose music I really love and dance to!  So I would like to experience the real music scene in Cuba, the real salsa, and sway to the vibrancy of their music - unless of course the rule of Fidel Castro hasn't effectively killed it.  But I don't think so.  Even in the most oppressive regimes, the people's musicality will always shine through.  And that would be the purpose of my trip to Cuba, to find out if the musicality of the Cubans have lived on, even though the world has already left them technologically and economically, and going there would be like going back in a time machine!

Finally, the Reflect phase will come in my trip to North Korea.  I know I'd have to travel in a tour group and have no Internet access in my stay there.  I also cannot choose where to go, or talk to the people on the street, or maybe take pictures or videos they don't sanction.  But I'm still curious to see how people there could live under a regime that manipulates their thinking and their minds as soon as they are born to this world.  I want to see how they could go on living and survive in an environment that they have been conditioned to think as heaven, and to think of America and South Korea, as hell or the devil.  I don't know if I'd have to feel pity or anger towards them, maybe I'd just want to find out how the human spirit can still survive amidst all that oppression.  I am curious as to what 'having fun' actually means to them!

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MOVIES THAT INSPIRED ME: Pretty Woman

I was 19 years old when I saw this movie and it made such an indelible mark in how I ran my life.  I am now almost 40 and the words the character of Julia Roberts say have been some of the hallmarks of my life.  In this scene below, when Julia gets pissed at Richard for telling Richard's lawyer what her real work was, she says, "I decide, I say who, I say when.....I say who...". That simple outburst became one of my mantras.  In my life I will say who, I will say when, I will decide - simply I will run my life the way I want it! 

Why was that such a big deal at that time to me?  Well, I was taking a course in college I didn't like.  We didn't have enough money at that time since we were 5 kids in college, and since I was in scholarship, I could not bale out and choose a course that I really liked!  So when Julia snapped those words, I vowed to myself, that soon as I leave college, "I will decide" my life's own course!

Today, the Veil, Tomorrow, What Next?

It really is surprising that France, of all countries, would ban the wearing of veils!  The country has a long history of upholding basic human freedoms, so much so that by discriminating against one group, might lead to further curtailment of the other unique characteristics of the minorities that live in its borders.  So its citizens should better watch out! 

In a way, I also understand why they have to do it, since the French are very keen on preserving the 'French-ness' of their way of life - and wearing a veil, is not part of that way of life.  But I believe there are more arguments against it, than for it.  Frankly, it's just plain discrimination, and it sends a message to Muslims everywhere that they are not welcome in the country.  Quite ironic since there are almost 5 million Muslims in France. 

I really hope the French legislators would think clearly about the implications of this action.  Because now, they are targetting one group.  What's to stop them from targetting another one in the future?

By the way, I'm Catholic and not a Muslim.  Catholics have our own share of discrimination in the past, so now, while no one is focusing yet on banning a unique feature of my religion, it is important to stand up for others whose identities are being challenged to the core.

Sharing My Daily Prayer

Everytime I get up in the morning, the first thing I do is to pray the rosary.  After that, I recite this prayer and the funny thing is, I don't remember now how I found it. All I remember was that, soon as I found it, I immediately had it printed out and kept it in my prayer book.  I have since been praying it everytime!  I love its theme wherein we give complete surrender to God in all our endeavors and allow Him to work his love for us.  I am proud to share with you this prayer, and I hope you can use it in your daily meditations -

O Lord God!  I did what You asked me to do

I just opened windows

Wide....

Wide....

And You did all the rest!

You poured into my heart

A blessed, blissful contentment

You saturated my mind

With gigantic thoughts of You

You struck an artesian well within me

Until sheer joy sprang forth

You led me out of the valley

Into a succession of incredible happenings

Problems which seemed insurmountable

Melted like wax before my eyes

Fears faded away like threatening clouds.

You startled me.  You amazed me

With the glory of Your revelation

It is true

Gloriously true

I have literally walked and breathed with God

I just opened windows

Wide....

Wide....

God, You did all the rest!

PRAYER:

Dear God, thank You for reminding me that without You I can do nothing.  Every perfect gift comes from You.  If I open wide my palm to manifest my total dependence on You, miracles do happen.  And so, Lord, though many things about tomorrow I don't seem to understand, remind me that it is You who holds my hand.  Tell me that I can only do so much, and all the rest is in Your hand

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Thank You Lord for Good Friends

My classmates in French class have become one important group of friends for me.  When I came back to the Philippines, after jetsetting between Hong Kong in Manila for four years, I was praying that I could find a set of friends very much like the cosmopolitan and sophisticated friends I had in HK.  It was a bit difficult to find some at first, but soon as I enrolled in basic French at the Alliance Francaise in Makati, I soon befriended these guys who have now become good friends of mine. 

I think one thing that links as together is that we are like-minded in so many ways, and we respect each other's opinions, whether they be abrasive or not.  They also rejoice at each of our accomplishments and we encourage each other whenever we have new projects.  Of course, one thing that really bonds us together is our love for the French language! For some of them, we started as early as Module 5, and now, we are already in Francais Superieur!  So we've really plowed through all the intermediate modules of French!

We also love to eat out and check out new places, and analyze the movies that we watch together.  Every day I thank God for giving me friends like them since it makes living in Manila much easier.